Do Superhero movies need saving? DC vs Marvel 2: Dawn of The Age of The Leotard Extended Universe

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Unless you’ve been living under a rock the last few years that has been a big trend in superhero movies. We are now at a stage where 3 or more come out every year, the question is do we need them? How will they keep us entertained? How can they differentiate themselves from the crowd?

Please enjoy this discussion and leave your thoughts below:

To get started here are all the Superhero films being released in the near future (starting this year)! Deep breath everyone!

2016

  • Deadpool (Fox/Marvel) aka Mr Pansexual Sweary Fourth Wall
  • Batman vs Superman (DC) aka Discount Civil War
  • Captain America: Civil War (Marvel)
  • Suicide Squad (DC) aka Harlequin and ”Not Heath Ledger”
  • X-Men Apocalypse (F) aka The Other Jennifer Lawrence Franchise
  • Dr Strange (M) aka Magic Sherlock

2017

  • Wolverine 3 (F)  aka The last movie before Hugh Jackman collapses under the weight of his own pecs and biceps
  • Guardians of The Galaxy 2 (M)
  • Not Black Widow Part 1 (DC) aka Wonder Woman
  • Spiderman (who knows?) – no not Tobey Maguire, no not him either… It’s Tom Holland
  • Thor Ragnarok (M)
  • Justice League Part 1 (DC) aka Team Up Timewonder-woman-amazons1

2018

  • Black Panther (M) aka slowly dragging superhero diversity into the 21st century
  • The Flash (DC)
  • Avengers Infinity War Part 1 (M)- I HATE HARRY POTTER FOR STARTING THIS 2 PART FILM NONSENSE
  • Antman and The Wasp (M) aka Tiny Tim and his gang of criminal stereotypes
  • Untitled Fox/Marvel film (read X-men/X-Force/Gambit/Deadpool 2/ god knows what?)
  • Aquaman (DC) aka not Seaman and Swallow
  • Animated Spiderman film

2019

  • NOT BLACK WIDOW Part 2 (M) aka Captain Marvel
  • Shazam (DC) copywright infringement as he was formerly known as Captai Mar-vel
  • Avengers Infinity War Part 2 (M)
  • Justice League Part 2 (DC) YOU HAVE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME!
  • Inhumans (M)

2020

  • Cyborg (DC) aka not Robocop or Ultron
  • Untitled Marvel Film
  • Green Lantern (DC) aka Deadpool’s worst nightmare
  • Plus 2 more untitled Marvel films

Which at my count makes 29 SUPER-HERO FILMS! AND THIS DOESN’T INCLUDE ALL THE SUPERHERO TV SERIES:

  • Daredevil
  • Jessica Jones
  • Luke Cage
  • Iron Fist
  • The Defenders
  • Arrow
  • Flash
  • Agents Of Shield
  • Legends Of Tomorow
  • Agent Carter

This is a lot of films, now you could argue that there would be twice as many action or horror films in the same length of time. But super-hero films are a much more specific type of film; they stand on and represent a set of principles and ideals and are meant to inspire and amaze audience. And as such with 6 films/ year they will need to do something to differentiate themselves from the crowd. The question is DO WE NEED THIS MANY?

Now to prefix this, I love superhero films; they are exciting, full of heart and a brilliant spectacle. And while they do not all hit the mark in terms of a cinematic masterpiece they are all a lot of fun!

Superhero films overcame their first obstacle right out of the gate with Nolan’s Batman Begins and Iron Man for the MCU. They got well respected and talented actors to play the leads roles, lending a certain weight to the projects which made people to sit up, pay attention and give the films a chance. This trend has continued with even the small bit parts being played by A-list actors. At last count there are 23  OSCAR WINNING  and  28 OSCAR NOMINATED actors involved with comic book projects alone (this excludes any production/writing/directing nominees). Unsurprisingly with this great depth of acting talent, and well rounded supporting casts, the performances are never an issue. The performances bring the heart, emotion and often the fun to these films.

Now a good cast can only work with what they’re given and if not given the best screenplay, there is only so much they can do. There is a wealth of source-material to pull from, up to 60 years of material in fact. There are so many arcs and characters that we could have a never ending stream of comic book movies until 2100! Although I think once we reach Squirrel Girl (M), Arm Fall Off Boy (DC) and Matter Eater Lad (DC)  maybe we should call time of death!

The name says it all!

The first major problem with super-hero movies is related to this. All of the studios have a huge roll-out plan for their extended universe’s with over arching themes and arcs to span years. Which means they want to have tie-ins, links, easter eggs, foreshadowing , cameos, and Stan Lee (DC gets a free pass here) splattered all over each movie. And while these can be harmless, like Howard The Duck at the end of Guardians, they can also cause serious problems. Take Avengers: Age Of Ultron, a solid film. Not Marvels finest and not Marvels worst. One of the many reasons it suffered were the ways it was trying to play lip service to set up future films: visions for Thor 3 and Infinity War, Wakanda and Klaus for Black Panther, Hulk disappearing into space for whatever reason. This takes time away from real character development resulting in 2 hours of continuous action spectacle…which is exhausting. *SPOILER ALERT*Especially since it meant we had no real incite into the Maximoff Twins but were then expected to cry when of them died? By the way the Maximoff twins are DEFINITELY..I REPEAT…DEFINITELY NOT MUTANTS.

Then you get things at the opposite end of the spectrum; poor/curve ball writing choices like Black Widow and Hulk falling in love in Ultron, the entire X-men Last Stand film and Thor films outside of Loki. Which the best actors in the world can’t do anything about

The result of this is that each film tries to up the stakes, the spectacle and the CGI in an attempt to feel new, interesting and relevant. When in fact, creating a smaller, human story would be a much more captivating and thrilling film. Is it any wonder that that best comic book films tend to be more at home in other genres: Captain America: Winter Solider is a thriller, while the Dark Knight is an out an out crime film, even Ant-Man is a heist film. Granted, Avengers 1 and the better X-men films are very much super-hero films but they thrive on a human heart and witty humour (especially Avengers) and not on Michael Bay Explosions and super-hero landings.

These tropes are so familiar and hard to avoid that even Deadpool, the most self-aware comic movie around, managed to fall into the same tropes whilst taking the piss out of them!

Granted there are often some great action sequences, (like the gem below) but with 6 films a year potentially relying on this back-up plan, how long until it gets tedious?

 

The other perhaps more troubling problem with these movies? Directing. It is inconsistent, now I realise it is unrealistic for the same director to do all the movies in one universe. But for every true hit movie there are usually a couple of misses! Consistency in the quality of director is crucial, poor direction makes a poor movie no matter what the rest of the film production is like. This then effects the appearance and quality of the whole universe, due to the studious insistence on interconnection. Here are some examples:

  • Incredible Hulk – Lous Letterier – Critically poor background
  • Iron Man 3 -Shane Black – Inexperienced
  • Thor: Dark World – Alan Taylor – who?
  • Captain America: The First Avenger – Joe Johnstone – acclaimed director of JURASSIC PARK 3!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Point made?

Brian Singer has made great X-men films, James Gunn and The Russo Brothers produced some of the best Marvel films (both of which were surprising efforts). Although it remains to be seen how the latter two will fair on their second outings. As both Jon Favreau and Joss Whedon (both acclaimed directors) created amazing first entries to the cannon. Yet studio intervention, pressure and scale resulted in the 2nd films which were good but unable to reproduce the magic a 2nd time around. Especially in Whedon’s case (1min 15 onwards).

I believe that to avoid superhero burnout we need to focus on smaller, grounded, personal stories within the grand scale AND directors must be held to a higher standard. Choosing experienced and quality directors who will make the smart choices. GRANTED even this does not guarantee success, take the first Thor and its director Kenneth Brannagh, an acclaimed Shakespearan director and actor; but an average film at best. But with all these movies vying for the limelight it is an issue which has to be addressed.

This brings me to Batman vs Superman. FULL DISCLOSURE I HAVEN’T SEEN IT YET. I am excited to see the film and will go in open-minded but I am not surprised by the luke-warm critical reception it has received:

  1. They are trying to set up a super-hero team up in one movie, something that took Marvel 5 films. This probably means screen time will be spread too thin between all the plot lines and tie-ins leading to forced cameos and exposition and probably poorly explained motives.
  2. The cast is strong and the acting will be great (especially excited for Batfleck) but this can’t save a movie if it’s already flawed.
  3. Zack Snyder. If we are all honest has he ever made a really good movie? 300, is solid. Watchmen is okay but far too long. Suckerpunch is a bizarre fever dream. All 3 are style over substance. His debut Dawn of the Dead remake is probably his best bet but still isn’t great. So why are people surprised when he doesn’t suddenly pull a cinematic masterpiece out of his backside?

Like I said I will go in open-minded and will probably enjoy the film, even find lots of praise for it. But will I love it the way I love other super-hero movies or even other movies in general? Probably not!

Now the future for super-hero movies does look promising, the casts continue to grow in talent. There are some exciting releases to come this year with Civil War (YAY SPIDERMAN), Suicide Squad and the emergence of magic in the MCU with Doctor Strange. After which, the super-hero genre is finally beginning to embrace diversity with the first African-Amercan and female lead movies being released in the near future. There are also some great directors attached to new exciting projects: David Ayer (Training Day) for Suicide Squad, Ryan Coogler (Fruitvale Station and Creed) for Black Panther and the Russo‘s have several films in the works.

But only time will tell if this film movement is a flash in the pan or whether it will last. But as long as audiences keep bringing in the huge profits you can be sure to see a lot more leotards over the next few years. Lets just hope the experience can always feel as new and exciting as it still does now!

Let me know your thoughts below!

My 10 favourite films of the year: A failed attempt at objectivity

With the year drawing to a close and these lists springing up everywhere, I thought why not get on the band wagon (and potentially be the straw that broke the camels back).

FULL DISCLOSURE: I haven’t scene Star Wars yet or the Oscar race films such as Spotlight, Danish Girl and the Revenant which are not out in the UK yet.

HONOURABLE MENTIONS:

Ant-Man, Avengers: Age Of Ultron and Spectre (reviews in hyperlinks below)

Ant-Man was a breath of fresh air into the MCU; small scale, charming and genuinely funny and entertaining.

Age of Ultron (MCU’s main poster child for the year) was a good solid entry into the Marvel cannon. Great performances and cast additons and an entertaining story. The main problem was the expected overcrowding and (what I suspect) are extra bits stuffed into the film at the studios request. Everything was done well, just not as well as the original.

I feel like taking the best elements of Skyfall and Spectre would make a near perfect movie, sadly separately they are both just good. Spectre also criminally underused Christoph Waltz as Blofeld, a missed opportunity if there ever was one.

These films were all good, just not quite enough to make it into the top 10.

Onwards and upwards:

10) It Follows (David Robert Mitchell)

There is a full review to come with this one but to summarize… a brilliant and original concept which sheds some interesting light on modern day attitudes towards sex and sexuality. Couple that with a very creepy, John Carpenter-esque score, great acting and some genuine scares makes for one of the best horror/thriller films in a long time.

I couldn’t choose between these next two and couldn’t leave them out (hence my failure at objectivity).

9)…B)  Macbeth (Justin Kurzel)

Possibly the most picturesque and beautiful film this year? Either way it is a masterpiece in cinematography and the rest of the film ain’t too shabby either.

9)…A) Slow West (John Maclean)

Maybe this film coud revive the dying Western genre? All I know is that its slow build, short run time, pointed dialogue and brilliant characters make for wonderful film.

FUN FACT: This is the 2nd best tourism add for New Zealand behind The Lord Of The Rings Trilogy.

Click here for my full review!

8) Beasts Of No Nation (Cary Fukunaga)

Brutal and beautiful visuals, difficult subject matter and some astounding acting. This really was the best way Netflix’s original movie platform could have started.

Here is my full review.

7) Jurassic World (Colin Trevorrow)

My second failure at objectivity. Jurassic Park is one of my favourite films of all time, as I am dinosaur obsessed. Jurassic World, although not as good as the original, certainly lived up to the hype and was thoroughly entertaining. Took me back to when I first saw Jurassic Park.

Here is my full review.

6) Mission Impossible: Rogue Nation (Christopher McQuarrie)

Somehow the 4th and 5th entries of this franchise are arguably on/above-par with the original. This is certainly helped by the continually growing all-star cast and a sensational performance by Rebecca Ferguson. Ludicrous stunts, a clever plot and a good story make this one of the best action films of the year.

Full review here.

5) Brooklyn (John Crowley)

This film, based on Colm Toibin’s book, is really a show case of Saorise Ronan’s ability. Despite her young age, she delivered an exceptional performance with depth and subtlety; she says more with one look than most can with a conversation. The screenplay is great and bolstered by a strong supporting cast and direction. This is a great film and deserves all the praise it is receiving.

4) The Martian (Ridley Scott)

Once again we are off to save Matt Damon (see Interstellar, Saving Private Ryan etc)! This is funny, smart and brilliantly helmed by Damon as stranded astronaut Mark Watney. A scene stealing performance from Donald Glover as the scientific whiz kid back on Earth is also worth a nod.

This scene says it all:

 

3) Carol (Todd Haynes)

This film is a beautiful piece of art. Haynes completely immerses  you in this gorgeous 50’s world allowing you to focus on the truly remarkable performances by Cate Blanchett and Rooney Mara. This film could have very easily become politicized, after all it is about a tale of love between two women in the 1950’s and the difficulties they face and could well still face today. Instead, however, gender doesn’t feature into this, it is just a story about two people falling in love and trying to make it work. Making it all the more beautiful.

2) Ex Machina (Alex Garland)

The directorial debut from the writer of 28 Days Later is impressive to say the absolute least. A thought provoking, stylish and clever Sci-fi film; it deals with complex subjects and doesn’t dumbdown or spoon-feed the audience as is so common in cinema today. Many films try and tackle artificial intelligence and, aside from 2001: A Space Odyssey, I cannot think of any other film that deals with it so originally, intelligently and tensely. All in all a resounding success.

1) Mad Max: Fury Road (George Miller)

George Miller returns to his Mad Max franchise with a huge victory for pracitcal effect and story telling in general. This movie is one long exhilarating ride, with barely time to catch your breath; it is incredible to watch. Rarely do films show such a single-minded dedication to an idea but I’m glad this film does! The title may suggest otherwise but Charlize Theron’s Furiosa is the real main character, and this is not the only female empowerment you’ll see during this film.

It was hard to choose between this and Ex Machina; but through sheer ferocity and excitement Mad Max won out for me.

FINAL THOUGHTS:

1)The success ofAlicia Vikander’s as Ava and Charlize Theron as Furiosa should surely prove now that women can lead critically and commercially successful films of any genre: Action, Sci-Fi not just love stories! Also a well deserved not too Emily Blunt for Sicario and Rebecca Ferguson for MI: Rogue Nation.

2) I regret not being able to see these movies so far this year and will have to catch up in the New Year: Trainwreck, Sicario, Crimson Peak, Legend, The Lobster, Diary Of A Teenage Girl, Black Mass, Hunger Games: Mockingjay Part 2.

Well that’s all folks. Please let me know what you think of this list in the comments: Agree? Disagree? Don’t care? Either way, let me know.

Happy New Year and thanks for reading!

 

 

 

 

Black Widow: Fur Is The New Catsuit aka UNDER THE SKIN

After discussing Martha Marcy May Marlene and Elizabeth Olsen, I thought this could be a good idea for a series of reviews. At the very least  it means I don’t have to actually think of any new ideas for a while. Anyway…

UNDER THE SKIN is a small independent film set in Scotland, starring Scarlett Johansson as a seductive/predatory alien who gives a new (not necessarily better) meaning to the phrase, ‘Glasgow Kiss’. Despite this strange set up this is a great film and deserves far more credit and publicity than it has received.

So for anyone who hasn’t seen/heard of it. Here is the trailer!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NoSWbyvdhHw

Granted this does not look like your typical alien/sci-fi fare. She is not green. She has no spaceship. She looks like a human. If that’s not your bag then you have my blessings to return to Guardians Of The Galaxy/ Star Wars/ ET. Basically anything that isn’t Green Lantern. It is an abomination. It’s unnatural. It makes me uncomfortable and it is just not right! Same goes for Battleships, a film about aliens that is based on a board game which has nothing to do with aliens. Oh and Jar-Jar Binx too. You can probably throw the Independence Day sequel into this pile as well when it comes out.

This film centres around the mysterious, alluring and unsettling alien (Scarlett Johansson) who preys upon the men of Scotland. I wont go into plot details much here because the magic of this film is never really knowing where it is all headed and being able to draw your own conclusions. I say this mainly because I’ve been unable to make any of significance and this is my  ‘Get out of jail free card”. Allowing me to divert your attention away from the fact that I know nothing while sounding much more intelligent and qualified than I have any right to do.

Johansson’s performance is exceptional. She exudes a seductive charm whilst also being cold, sinister and distant. As a straight man, I find this confusing. A feeling I’m sure men of Scotland will share with after seeing this film. She also has a pretty good English accent. Something of a rare commodity these days. For a comparison here is Russel Crowe in Robin Hood.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wnfHqnaM0yI

But at least he tried unlike a certain someone in the Eagle! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3TLYO2I5kgw

Her character makes you question what it means to be human, especially as she develops a childlike inquisitive nature throughout the film. Is it possible for her to make her new home here on Earth? Or will she remain drifting and lost in the nightclubs of Scotland.

Shots of misty, green countryside to gritty, foreboding town centres capture the predatory feel of the main character. There are some truly original visual moments which deliver something I’d never seen in cinema before. A feat that becomes harder and harder with each passing movie release. The director did an excellent job. I’m sure he’ll be relieved to hear I approve.

If I were to have one gripe. It would be that the supporting character of ”The Biker” gets practically no explanation. I realise this helps to keep everything mystifying and magical and leave you asking for more. But here’s the thing this is an adaptation of a Michael Faber book from 2000. The book gives some more details about this character and helps create a fuller understanding of the situation as a whole.

Well, apparently anyway. I’ve not read it. I’m mean who owns books anymore?  Before you judge me though. Have you read it?.. Didn’t think so.

I think this could have been a helpful addition, but as usual I am probably wrong.

This film is ”arty” and the polar opposite of a Hollywood blockbuster. This can be a turn off for some; it isn’t an easy watch and wants you to ask questions. The dialogue is sparse. The answers are not all nicely laid out and explained with a convenient Morgan Freeman voice-over. It builds slowly and with lots of intensity but doesn’t rush anything.  It is intriguing, original and, as we enter the usual summer movie madness of big-budget action, franchise re-quels and cheesy rom-coms, it could be just the alternative you are looking for.

VERDICT: ”I AM GROOT”….‘E.T. PHONE. HOME,”….”IN SPACE NO ONE CAN HEAR YOU SCREAM.” SOD IT THAT’LL DO. 

P.S         ALSO WHERE THE HELL IS THE BLACK WIDOW MOVIE AT MARVEL? DONT JUST TRY AND DISTRACT ME WITH SPIDERMAN, BLACK PANTHER AND VISION. WE WANT ANSWERS!

P.P.S      HAVE A LOOK AT SNL’S BLACK WIDOW AGE OF ME SPOOF

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j_5KgpN38hM</a

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The Olsen Triplet: Martha Marcy Marianne Marion Mandy Megan Michelle May Marlene

With all the current focus on The Avengers: Age Of Ultron. I thought I would discuss one of the new cast members and relative unknowns Elizabeth Olsen aka Scarlet Witch.

Martha Maroon Magic Marvellous

Her first feature film appearance was in the independent drama MARTHA MARCY MAY… Oh I Give Up I dont know which is her name!

Here is the trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0_k3wCsOgqk

A peaceful farm becomes a darkened dinner table full of young men quietly eating whilst intently avoiding eye contact, while the women stand outside on baited breath listening for any murmurs of discontent. Marcy May (Olsen) runs into a forest and hides whilst being followed by a young man. All of the above takes place with very little dialogue only helpings to further our sense of foreboding. The first real conversation takes place with the young man finding Marcy May, alone in a diner, and chastising her for leaving. Olsen (now helpfully named Martha) then makes an intense and emotional phone call to her sister, Lucy, ending it with a confused and painful, ”I can’t leave now”. Lucy (Sarah Paulson) picks Martha up and brings her to the lake house where she lives with her husband (Hugh Dancy). This is the film’s real question. How do you adapt to a new, better life when still haunted by a traumatic past? Especially since the past makes you what you are. Philosophy aside. I struggle with this all the time. I keep ordering food from the same take away. I keep giving them another chance. But deep down I know that I’m just going to get food poisoning again!

The films switches seamlessly between Martha’s increasingly paranoid behaviour at the lake house with her sister and her previous life at the tranquil commune. One of Martha’s first interactions in her new home is to go for a swim in the public lake absolutely naked. Martha doesn’t understand her sister’s shock and anger, much less that this is not normal behaviour. The focus of the scene stays with Lucy, while in the background Martha runs down to the lake and goes swimming. This projects a childlike innocence and naivety, while focusing on how normal this seems. Until both you and Lucy, simultaneously, realise what she has done. This cuts straight to Martha and the other commune members swimming naked together. This is a remarkable scene which if not done so well could easily have become an intro to a high budget porno titled, ‘‘The Lady In The Lake’’. By recent cinematic standards this is an achievement in itself. Contrast this with Megan Fox in Michael Bay’s Transformers series and TNMT for ideas how to sexualize everything: fixing a car, getting on and off a motorbike, a seductive robot who then tries to kill you, a reporter bending out the window of a moving van, turtles, cars, robots again…. God I hate Michael Bay! …Huh?… 2 more transformers movies?!!…. At least?!….And a TNMT sequel?!…Fuck this I’m out!…………………..

Each act of Martha increasing paranoia leads into a Marcy May commune scene. Each new bit of information is, in retrospect, never enough to completely explain Martha’s actions. You leave each scene with curiosity partially satisfied whilst never knowing the whole truth. What you see is harrowing, intense and at times stomach churning but we never see the full extent of the control, manipulation and abuse Martha endured at the commune. These transitions between Martha’s memories and reality; force the audience to ride the line between sanity and delusion with Martha. The cuts are clever and beautifully thought out. So much so that the only thing like it is trying to decipher which drunk texts you sent and which were an alcohol induced fever dream. Only to find you already deleted your messages, in a whirlwind of drunken rage and guilt.

The commune’s elaborate ‘’cleansing’’ ceremony is as enjoyable as it sounds and worse to watch. It completes Martha’s transformation from innocent victim into Marcy May; an indoctrinated, complicit and committed member of the commune. [INSERT LINDSAY LOHAN/MILEY CYRUS JOKE HERE]. I won’t give too much away but the ‘’cleansing’’ is less puppies, sunshine and rainbows and more like the film ‘’Source Code’’ but instead of defusing a bomb every 8 minutes you just have to kill a puppy.

I'm sorry for this visual!

I’m sorry for this visual!

The film boils down to two relationships. Marcy May and Patrick, the commune’s charismatic leader and Martha and her sister, Lucy. Marcy May is enticed by Patrick and quickly lets her guard down to find a controlling, manipulative and abusive patriarch. In contrast, Lucy, who is guilt driven to compulsively act as Martha’s surrogate mother, genuinely cares and loves her. For this Lucy is met with a constant icy, evasiveness. This is the power Patrick holds over both Marcy May and Marlene

Now so far I have avoided the C WORD and for good reason, it is a show stopper. But there’s no way round it. The commune is in every sense of the word a C-U-errmm-L-T. CULT. Think the Manson’s with less murder meets the Westborough Baptist Church minus all that God stuff. Patrick appears a caring teacher on the surface with his mantra of helping people find their place. But under the skin is the real Patrick: menacing, possessive and predatory. He uses isolated young women’s insecurities and weaknesses to idolize himself.

What are Patrick’s motivations? How do people end up at the commune? What pushed Martha there? Why do they all use the alias Marlene Lewis when answering the phone? These questions make the film and its ending all the more intriguing and unsettling. It is best to leave people wanting more rather than full, gassy and noxious. See the Roman vomitoriums for confirmation.

Elizabeth Olsen carries this film with an exceptional performance. I enjoyed this subtle thriller and would recommend it!

RATING: ‘’I’M A TEACHER AND A LEADER… AND SCARLET WITCH’’

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Marvel’s Avengers: Age Of Cameos

Slate The Silver Screen presents: Avenger’s:Age Of Ultron

Following on from what was not just one of the most commercially successful films of all time but also a critical hit was never going to be easy. This was the task laid at the feet of our Aveneger’s for round two. For those living under a rock here is the trailer:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PqkR0SwFN_4

My initial reaction to seeing the film was (as eloquently put by a Marvel fanboy in the same theatre as me) ‘Holy Shit. This is awesome!’.  My next reaction was the following equation which DC and Zack Snyder have clearly used for the new Batman voice:                                                     (Bale + Batvoice)(Spader + Ultron) – Nolan(DC)  =  BATFLECK

The film opens with a stylish battle sequence of the Avengers attempting to receive Loki’s (read Tom Hiddlestone’s) Sceptre. This sets the tone for the movie with a great balance between inspiring action set pieces, witty one-liners and dark apocalyptic overtones. Here we meet our new mutants  superhereos; The Maximoff Twins. Pietro and Wanda, aka Quicksilver and Scarlet Witch, are described best by Agent Hill, ‘One’s fast and one’s weird’. Early on we see snippets of their powers and they are pretty incredible. This is especially impressive given the scene stealing role of Quicksilver in the rival series X-Men: Days Of Future Past.

Following the recovery of the sceptre is a well-directed, funny and thrilling journey all around the Earth and back again as a result of Stark’s completion of the peacekeeping Ultron programme. Filled with expertly crafted, if a little CGI-heavy, action pieces to keep momentum going throughout the film. However, what makes this film great is the punctuating scenes of real character interaction, reaction and above all humanity. A subject core to the movies idea. The best parts of this movie are when the heroes are at their worst; downtrodden, beaten, scared and unsure, in essence human.

The new additions to the cast do a wonderful job especially James Spader who delivers an entertaining performance as, the equal parts malevolent and compassionate, Ultron. I also realised that my ideal woman would be Scarlett Witch, a red headed woman in a red leather jacket with a heavy eastern European accent and adept at mind control. I feel this should surprise me more than it does.

This film is alas not perfect. The first half of the film thrives on its intensity spearheaded by the fact that the Avengers have met their match and are in genuine danger. This a stark contrast to most modern action films where the protagonist is nearly invincible! However, the final confrontation sees our heroes vastly outnumbered against an army of robots. Robots who earlier in the film were difficult to disarm and destroy. During this climax the Avengers start dispatching there enemies with such ease it dissipates much of the suspense built during the first half. Nevertheless, it is shot so thoughtfully and originally that I quickly forgave this and lost myself in the action. My one other complaint would be the Shield Airship Ex Machina coming along to save the day.

This addition to the Marvel canon did excel in bringing together lots of different plot elements from stand-alone character films and really helped begin to connect this huge sprawling universe that is Marvel. But… they excelled a little too much. So far beyond your usual Stan Lee Cameo it is hard to keep track. I don’t want to spoil things so for anyone who wants a list of cameos please read on past the verdict.

VERDICT: ‘’I can’t wait for the next one… 2018? You’ve got to be kidding me…. Two parts!?!… Fuck you Harry Potter and The Deathly Hallows’’

 

Captain Cameo: A list of all Marvel characters mentioned/seen in the film

Captain America/Captain Spandex

Thor – God of Biceps and Thunder

Iron Man

Hulk

Black Widow

Hawkeye

Hawkeye’s Wife

Hawkeye’s Child 1

Hawkeye’s Child 2

Ultron

Scarlet Witch aka the Olsen Triplet

Kiss Ass Quicksilver

Stan Lee

Stan Lee’s War veteran friends

Captain Rhodes aka War Hammer

Captain Rhodes again

Capt.. oh wait this time he is War Hammer

The guy with wings we didn’t care about from Captain America 2

Peggy Carter aka Caps love interest whose been dead 75 years

Nick Fury

Mariah Hill in both tight party dresses and a tight catsuit

Andy Serkis as Gollom as Arms Dealer No1

Fictional African Country No1

Scandinavian Scientist No1

Paul Bettany as Jarvis/ Dead Jarvis/ Beyond the grave Jarvis/ Vision aka Marvel fanboy fever dream

Heimdall

Pepper Potts and Jane Foster by name (both of whom are stated to be very significant to Iron Man and Thor yet weren’t deemed significant enough to make an appearance. If I were them I’d be pissed! I mean come on Falcon was in it. Twice.)

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